From the outside, I was living the dream. Good job. Good salary. Still in shape (or so I told myself). Partying with friends. Traveling when I wanted. By all accounts, I was "doing well." I would rate my life as a B+.

 

But every morning, I woke up exhausted—20 pounds heavier than I wanted to be, stressed, mindlessly scrolling my phone. To make matters worse, whenever I was scrolling it seemed like everyone else had it figured out.

 

There wasn’t a rock-bottom moment—just a slow realization that I was settling. When did a B+ life become ok?

 

I wanted to be “that guy.” The one who was living an A+ life. Fit, confident, successful, thriving.

 

So, I did what high achievers do: I set ambitious goals

• Get in shape

• Reduce drinking

• Eliminate social media

• Find work I care about

• Build a great relationship

• Live in a place I love

 

I tried to do everything at once, convinced that sheer willpower would carry me through. After all, I considered myself a high achiever. I would go all in for a few weeks, or maybe in a couple months, but then life happened. Work got stressful. Old habits crept back in. Momentum faded. And suddenly, I was back where I started—except now, I was even more frustrated.

 

I am someone who does what I say I am going to do. Why can't I just remain consistent.

 

Then I took a step back and looked at when I had been successful before.

 

In sports, it wasn’t about going hard for a few weeks—it was about showing up, day after day, following a system, and trusting that the results would come. In school, I never questioned if I was making progress—I had a clear roadmap and the accountability to stay on track. In my career, I knew the next steps, learned what I had to and consistently executed on them.

 

That’s when it clicked: I didn’t need more motivation. I needed structure. A system.

 

So I built one for my life.

1. Clarity – Clearly defining what I wanted and outlining the steps to get there. (Before, I had vague goals—now, I had a roadmap.)

2. Consistency – Creating accountability systems to keep me on track, even when motivation faded.

3. Time – Understanding that real success doesn’t happen overnight. I needed to commit, trust the process, and enjoy the journey.

 

For a few months, this system worked wonders—I was making progress in every area of my life. But then I got cocky. I thought, “I got this,” and let go of the accountability piece. And just like that, I slipped back into old patterns.

That’s when I realized the missing piece: a team.

 

In every stage of life where I had thrived, I had people around me—coaches, teammates, mentors—who pushed me forward. So I hired a coach. Then I joined a group of like-minded men. A group that provided support, challenge, and the kind of accountability that kept me moving forward, even when life got hard.

 

Today, I’m in the best shape of my life—stronger, leaner, and faster than I was in college. I’ve built a business I love, drastically reduced drinking, and eliminated the distractions that were draining my time and energy. But more than anything, I feel locked in. I wake up with purpose, knowing that I’m building a future I’m proud of.

 

And the best part? I know I’m just getting started.

 

If you’ve ever felt like you were meant for more—but you’re stuck, inconsistent, or spinning your wheels—I get it. I know what it’s like to feel frustrated, to question if you’re falling behind, to wonder if you’ll ever figure it out.

 

The key to change isn’t more motivation. It’s a system. When you have the right structure—clarity, consistency, and accountability—change isn’t just possible. It’s inevitable.